Investing on Relationships (1) (WHILAL pt. 6)

Investment (n) - an act of devoting time, effort, or energy to a particular undertaking with the expectation of a worthwhile result.

Every time we hear the word investment, it will lead us to the idea of money or wealth. However, does anyone familiar with the idea of investing on relationships? In which relationship here is not only limited on lovers; but also family, friends, coworkers, colleagues, and any type of relationship you could ever mention. The main difference of investing in relationships compared to other type of investment is that we do not need any assets to start it; we only need to put some effort to do it.

How do we invest on other people? The basic investment would be listening and giving some interest. Believe me that every person who we met today, either we met them in the school, public transportation, or even in the restroom, have stories to tell. Last summer, I had to use “ojek” service to go from the airport to the place I stayed. (p.s. “Ojek” is like a cab, but instead of using car to transport people, they use motorbike to do it, it is very common in Indonesia). We started a conversation, and he told me an interesting story that he has a daughter younger than me that was working on a scholarship application process. I assured him that as long as his daughter study hard, never worry about the money because someone else would pay for her studies. I have met so many interesting people just by listening and giving some interest. 

Me and my very good friend, Mike - Japan 2011. He lives in NY.

Did I invest on people by listening and give some interest? YES, I just did. By just listening to people story, I just made a new friend. I might not see him again, but I just assured him that he did not need to worry about his daughter, and I was inspired that an “ojek” rider wanted his daughter to get the best education. Win-win! Imagine that for at least once a day, we put small effort to listen to one person’s story. I bet you that you have no idea how much these stories could inspire you.

And that would be a short-term investment on people! Short term could be defined as to people that we might not see again, but we could never be sure! Because who knows that after years, we would be able to see them again?

Me and Mike's family during Christmas 2013 - Japan 2011 was the last time I saw him.

Does that mean that there is a long-term investment? Yes! And stay in my blog for the next part!

Leave comments below for any thought or ideas because I love to hear back!

If anyone wondering what is WHILAL, read this:
http://chtimw13.blogspot.com/2013/03/introduction-to-whilal.html

"Invest in the human soul, who knows it might be diamond in the rough."

- Mary McLeod Bethune

A Glimpse of Post-Highschool Life

Last week I was invited to attend my high school graduation in Malang. I am very excited to come because this could be time where I see some of my friends whom I last saw two years ago. Something that I did not expect was a reminiscent over three years of high school during the event.

#bestselfiesofGraduation

My high school was not just a regular high school because the students were carefully selected from all over East Java province (equivalent to a state in the U.S) to spend the next three years together in a boarding school. 

It was a very sacred moment for me when the graduates throw their hats off as a confirmation that they are officially finished high school. I was in their shoes two years ago. That moment of graduation means a lot of things. When I saw they gave hugs to each other, it struck me because I know that maybe they won’t be able to see each other again after a while. When I saw some of them talked to their girlfriend/boyfriend, I knew that their relationship might not go as they planned. When they talked to their best friends and promised to stay in touch, I knew that they would not actually stay in touch and after a while they were not best friend anymore. 

Graduates and alumni

My high school taught me loads of lessons, but one lesson that it taught me very well is that people come and go. At some point in our life, we have to realize that people might mean the world to us right now, and accept that in the near future their part in our lives must be over. One thing that we should not worry is that their spaces in our heart would be filled with new friends and new experiences. Something that we have to remember is that even though those people are not in our life anymore, somehow they would forever be part of us in many forms; it could be memories, it could be lessons, it could be heartache, it could be anything else we would like them to be. 

With teachers and friends

Attending my high school’s graduation is a good reminder that I once meant the world to some people. It is a great place to know that my friends are doing very well in college. Also it was good to know that some people actually miss me. Looking back two years ago, I had so many worries about my future but it is good knowing that I am doing fine after high school and I believe that the graduates would be doing fine as well.  

"Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. The older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young."

- Mary Schmich

A Tribute to Mom

For the one who brought me to this world, Mom.

I would like to let you know that you are the best mom on earth.

I remember that day, when I was in kindergarten, you took me to school using our neighbor's bike because the motorbike was broken.
That day when you got mad at me because I bit my friend's ear.

You always reminded me to study all the time even there was no homework or test the next day.
I have no idea who I would be without you.

Seven years ago, you were diagnosed with tumor in your womb and it was very devastating to me. I was only thirteen years old when you had your first surgery. After the surgery when we visited you, my birthday was the first thing you remembered. It was my birthday during your first surgery and I promised to God that I would be a good son for you.

Me and my Mom last summer

I realized that sometimes I am not a good son, getting annoyed little bit because you keep texting me everyday just to remind me to eat and pray. Sometimes I forgot to call you back because I get too busy with stuffs I am doing. But deep in my heart, I love so much.

I know how much you work hard to provide for our daily needs from 9 a.m to 9 p.m everyday. And still get a chance to accompany your children studying in the night. We might not be the richest family, but I know we are one of the happiest family on earth because we always praise God for whatever we have for dinner or whatever we wear on our body. You teach me to never take anything for granted, and not enough thank you for that.

I am the happiest son on Earth when I knew that you are finally tumor-free two months ago. God finally answered my seven years prayer, and I hope that you'll keep healthy so I can make you proud of me.

I can keep writing all day for everything you have done for me and my brother and sister. I love you and miss you very very very much. And I will see you in less than a week.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

Sincerely,


Me

Reverse Culture Shock

Hi Readersssss.

It's been a while since my last post (I think I said this for my last three posts, but bear with me!). This post stemmed from a conversation with some friends during a dinner three days ago. Two of my friends asked me: Timmy, do you need to re-adjust when you get back home? Or is it easy for you?

What a question. Before answering the question, I have a great news that I will be in Indonesia over the summer. I'm leaving on the 15th and can't wait to be in my home country.

Let's go straight to the point. I will answer the second part first, Is it easy? I was surprised to find out last summer that going back to Indonesia after spending a whole academic year in the U.S was not as easy as I thought it would be. Why?

Here are why.

1. Language. As weird as it sounds but I need to re-adjust with the language. I use English 90 percent of the time when I am in U.S, watch TV in English, and even think in English. Last summer, I found myself stumbled on Indonesian words [brain-fart alert!] and struggled to compose sentences in Indonesian structure.

2. Culture. The very different culture from Indonesia and the U.S made me have to adjust. Because there are a bunch of different what-is-okay and what-is-not-okay. For example, it is okay to use my left hand to give stuff to people here, but I have to use my right hand to give stuff to people in Indonesia. Another example is saying hi to friends. In the US it is very normal to give hug to your friend, but not normal to do it in Indonesia. Which I get really used to it. So I have to remember where I am to make sure that I would not do something culturally impolite.

3. Friends. Yeah, friends. It is hard for me to maintain conversation with them because I live in a place that is very different than Indonesia. My conversation with my good friend would usually just catch up and what else? I could not start rambling about some TV shows because some of them are not aired in Indonesia. And another problem is that most of my friends have their new friends and activities already; so they do not have time to hangout with me.

Yeah, those are three big things that I would need to re-adjust every time I come back to Indonesia. It is actually fun to live in two different countries, but there are always positives and negatives to every thing. I am grateful with my opportunities, and will make the most out of it. So for some of you that lives in a country, I think you have to be grateful because you have many good friends and you should take a great care of them!

Hope this provide some insight on living on two different countries.

Comments are encouraged!

I promise I will update my blog more often!

The Idea of Home

Hi readers!

Currently, I am enjoying my spring break so I would have plenty extra time to write on my blog. In this post, I would like to take on the idea of home. Hope y'all enjoy it!

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People say that there is no place like home. The place where we enjoyed our childhood, the place where we grow up, the place where we have so many friends and memories. This notion would be 100 percent correct for most people. Why most people? Because some of us has traveled such a long way and could not find place like home.

This idea struck me when I had a conversation with a tutor at the university writing center. She asked me, where I would like to be after college? Yes, many people have asked me this question and it is still long way to go. It is a tough question for me because I do not have the answer and because I could not control what will happen to me after college. She told me about her husband who went to college in New York and now living in the United States. Currently, her husband misses Turkey yet he had spent more time in the US than in Turkey. Funny story, once when he was younger, he sent a mail to his parent in English. He did not remember that his parent do not speak any English.

What about me?
I had left my hometown after I graduate from junior high school. I was fifteen. I had to go to school three hours away from my home, and I only went home once every four months. Now, I am living in the US, and I only went home once in a year. I realize it when I went back home to Indonesia last summer, I met with some of my old friends but I realize that it is hard to maintain conversation - we just catch up on each other. Then I did not have much to talk about. Coming back to my hometown, everything seemed very different. People and places that were once familiar to me, were not familiar anymore. Does people and my hometown have changed? Or is it me who changed so much?

I do not know. What I know is that a place that once I called home does not feel as home-y as before. I am just 20 years old and I have spent a quarter of my life away from the place I grew up. I am excited with my life, but sometimes I am afraid. What if one day I might not have a place that I could call "home"?

"When you finally go back to your old home, you find it
wasn't the old home you missed but your childhood." -Sam Ewing-

Making Life Decision

I believe that most of you, at least once, had been faced with tough life decision. I guess that most of us would talk to people who matters to us on how to make the decision. They could suggest us anything. Yet, we all know that at the end, we are the one who make the decision and we are the one who would be affected by our own decision.

In my 20 years, I had been faced with several tough life decisions. It all started at the end of my junior high school when I had to decide whether to go to a high school 3 hours away from my hometown or not. This decision was very tough to make, because I would have to live far away from my family, I was just 15 years old, I had to life in a dormitory with so many strangers, and it is a brand new high school. Leaving to a new town would mean that I have to start over and tried to make new friends. I decided to go to that high school and having best years of my whole life! Overseas travel, meeting so many amazing friends, meeting my mentor, and the experience taught me to be a stronger and more humble person.

The next major life decision is to go to the US for university or not, at the end of my high school year. It was tough choice for me because, as you all may have known, my mother suffered tumor since I was 13 years old, and the idea to move to a different country 30 hours flight away from my hometown was very scary. I did not understand the culture,  I did not speak the language very fluent, and honestly I had no idea where Lubbock is. Did I take the opportunity? Yes, I did. I am now also enjoying best year of my life. Making great new friends, learning a lot about new culture, be able to travel around the US, and I learned that if we are being honest and genuine to everyone, we could give them happiness.

The thought of moving around is scary. The idea of not settling is frightening. Yet, every time I decided to take the opportunity to move, I am having the best time of my life. I do not know where I would end up after college or maybe in several months. Yet I know that my life is an adventure, and my job is to enjoy it and work as hard as possible. 

"I don't wanna know where I would be in 5 years because I want my life to be an adventure" -Robin Scherbatsky-

New York during Christmas

Hi Readersssssssssss!!

I am sorry for missing another month. I won't have a long writing on this post, but instead I would throwback on my winter break to New York City!! Enjoy the pictures and I wish y'all could be here someday!!

*pardon me for too many selfies*

Inside Empire State Building

New York Stock Exchange

Wall Street

Time Square

Time Square 2

Rockefeller Center

4th Street

Grand Central Station

Central Park

View of NY skyline from Central Park

Belvedere Castle

NYC skyline

Central Park

Madison Square Garden

Empire State Building

Lombardi's - a legendary pizzeria in New York

And of course, the Lady Liberty!

"Once a year go someplace you've never been before"  -Dalai Lama-